Thats y im scared when u say u love me.
I’m thinking 1680 X 1050. What’s yours??? ;-P Like if u get it 😉
“I do not exist to build your ego with my pain.” ~ Roy McWilliams
“Withhold admiration from a narcissist and be disliked. Give it and be treated with indifference.” Mason Cooley
Narcissistic personality disorder is a mental disorder in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance, a deep need for admiration and an extreme preoccupation with themselves.
I’m writing about NPD because one of my college mates has it and It has affected my college life majorly. Very recently I came to know NPD existed and its a disease. My class mate who is a total bitch who has random crazy emotional outbursts and the way she would over react to everyday normal things all started making sense.
People with NPD are a big pain in the ass. They are very difficult people to be with. They can never be your true friends and they only think great of themselves. To them the rest of the world are losers.
They say this disorder occurs due to unknown reasons or due to parenting problems. My friend did have a screwed up childhood. The stories she would tells us about how her parents treated her were really cruel. I don’t know why any parent would handle their kid the way her parents did to her. Its not fair to any child.
A person with narcissistic personality disorder may:
- React to criticism with rage, shame, or humiliation – my friend if she gave any class presentation and if the reaction from the class wasn’t positive or if no one liked her ideas. She would get bugged and start insulting you there and there only.
- Take advantage of other people to achieve his or her own goals – she would take advantage like greatly. If she wanted to go to city center for only her work, she would take 2 other friends along who didn’t want to go. She would somehow convince them and just so that she wouldn’t have to pay taxi money alone and it would be split among 3 people. And all this just for her work.
But if v asked her to come to citycenter for our work and if she wasn’t in mood. She would make sure she wouldn’t go.
And if the whole class is going on a picnic and if she’s not in mood of going, she would screw up the plan somehow or start convincing people how sucky the place is and by other negative comments. Extremely Manipulative.
- Have excessive feelings of self-importance – she would think she was the best person in this world. Her other friends are stupid. Their comments are not valid. Make us feel inferior to her.
- Exaggerate achievements and talents – She exaggerates on marks, assignments, where she stays, money. Literally everything.
- Be preoccupied with fantasies of success, power, beauty, intelligence, or ideal love.
- Have unreasonable expectations of favorable treatment
- Need constant attention and admiration
- Disregard the feelings of others, and have little ability to feel empathy
- Have obsessive self-interest
- Pursue mainly selfish goals
These symptoms totally exist. Yes, it is a disease. First even I couldn’t believe it that such a personality disorder could exist. Now you must understand why I chose the above quote “I do not live to build your ego with my pain”, Because I truly use to feel like that with her friendship. I use to feel her very existence in my life use to be a pain. At one point I hated her so much and couldn’t take it anymore I use to want to punch her in the face every time she opened her mouth and ranted another one of her fake lies.
Being a narcisstic’s friend this is exactly how I would feel emotionally exhausted, I could never rely on her and would be constantly undermined by her. She was bloody hell toxic to my life. At one point we had given her a name called toxic friend. Or Frenemy. We use to hate her. Like how the world hated Saddam Hussain. Somewhere along the same hate lines.
But then the more I researched about it the more I found out that so many people in the world have someone in their life who is a narcisstic. It could be you, or one of your parents, or your siblings or a friend or co-worker. And It is not their fault really. I’m really thankful to god that my parents or siblings are not narcisstics, i cannot imagine living with one. We need to understand they have a problem and somehow be smarter and not fall into their trap of manipulating everything according to what they want. Though, im still finding for a proper solution to deal with it, there’s no solution really.
You could cut off ties, Confront him/her, Maintain your distance.
We other classmates are dealing with her by maintaining our distance. The more closer we get to her the more it hurts us only. We are talking to her but she’s not considered part of our group anymore. We don’t trust her, we don’t even trust her to go n photocopy something. And not even the most simple task of checking if movie tickets are available online. Because if she doesn’t want to go for the movie, she will lie and say tickets are not available. Because even though she doesn’t want to go, she also doesn’t want us to go. She can’t see other people having fun without her. Again Manipulative behaviour.
This was a very interesting article I found online – http://www.readme.ae/articles/friend-or-foe
Do take time and read it. It was the first article I came across which made me think im not the only one suffering from such a friendship.
i hope you never have such a friend or family member in your life because these friendships/realtionships I have learnt only makes u do things in life which u regret forever. If you do, you need to realise you are not the weird one they are. And you need to stand up for yourself and not take their shit no matter what role they play in your life.
Reference of symptoms – http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0001930/
Well I don’t know if you do watch glee. But if you don’t your missing out on one of the best shows ever TV has brought to you. Each episode has a moral behind it and I’m sure you can relate yourself to at least one of the characters. The best part about Glee is the way the story is written and how it portrays each character and shows how they deal with situations. From Arty who is crippled on a wheelchair to Sue Sylvester the meanest woman you’l ever watch on TV, Glee has something to teach everyone from a young teen to an adult.
Here are some of my favourtie quotes from Glee, Season 2:
Sue: One girl ate a pigeon. That’s how badly they wanna be Cheerios.
Finn: Rachel is what you’d call a controlist.
Rachel: I’m controlling. Controlist isn’t a word.
Sue: Oh God, Will, let me break it down for you. High school’s a dry run for the rest of your life. Not everyone can be champions; not everyone should be champions. The world needs fry cooks; bus drivers…
Brittany: I don’t brush my teeth. I rinse my mouth out with soda after I eat. I was pretty sure Dr. Pepper was a dentist.
Brittany: Please don’t pull out all my teeth. I’ll look like an adult baby, but with boobs.
Rachel: The only way this relationship is gonna work is if we’re both losers.
Brittany: I made him a card that said ‘heart attacks are just from loving too much.’
Sue: Asking someone to believe in a fantasy, no matter how comforting, is cruel.Brittany: He’s the dumbest person on the planet, and that’s coming from me.
Rachel: I’m only really generous if there’s something in it for me.
Finn: Yeah. But I still like you.
Finn: I’m with Rachel now. She’s a lot shorter than Quinn and she talks a lot, but I love her.
Kurt: When you’re different … when you’re special … sometimes you have to get used to being alone.
Will: I thought we were friends.
Sue: That got boring.
Brittany: Mr. Schu taught me the second half of the alphabet. I stopped after M and N. I thought they sounded too similar and got frustrated.
Doris: I’ll bet people say you look man-ish, but I think it’s perfectly alright for a woman to be handsome.
Quinn [to Rachel]: You used to be just sort of unlikeable, but now I feel like punching you every time you open your mouth.
Artie: I told my parents I only want one thing for Christmas this year: stop friending me on Facebook.
Will: Who can tell us what an anthem is?
Brittany: The bottom of an ant’s pant.
Will: So close.
Santana: I look hot and smart. I feel like Michelle Obama.
Rachel: Blaine Warbler, I’m gonna rock your world.
Kurt: Bisexual is a term that gay guys in high school use when they wanna hold hands with girls and feel normal. Holly: Sex. It’s just like hugging. Only wetter.
Holly: So just remember whenever you have sex with someone, you’re having sex with everyone they’ve ever had sex with. And everybody’s got a random
Lauren: You’re always singing about R.E.S.P.E.C.T. but respect isn’t something you can ask for, you have to demand it.
Sue: Honey Badger I am lactating with rage!
Jesse: You kind of sing and dance like a zombie who has to poop
Santana: I’m a bitch because I’m angry. I’m angry because I have all of these feelings, feelings for you, that I’m afraid of dealing with, because I’m afraid of dealing with the consequences.
Santana: Yeah, well, this is a club. This is not a family.
Brittany: Okay, well, family is a place where everyone loves you no matter what, and they accept you for who you are.
Hope you had fun reading the quotes. Glee has inspired me in many things about my life. And somehow i can relate myself little bit with all the characters. Who do u relate to the most? Do drop in a comment.
Being single sucks when you know exactly who you want.
I read this line somewhere..and really speaking its so true. 😦